Two people meet, fall in love and decide to live together.
And as the fairytales go, they live happily ever after…
WAIT!
This is not about Snow White or Cinderella.
This is reality.
I have a friend who has been living with her husband of 10 years.
When they first got married, the Husband was heard saying, “Do I need to change my lifestyle after marriage?”
I am not sure he said so out of naiveness or ignorance but it’s a darn good question, to be frank.
Once again, the question is “Do you need to change your lifestyle after you tie the knot?”
Your opinion?
In fact, you don’t need to think too hard and answer me.
I’ve got the answer for you.
What better way than letting a real life proof to answer this life-altering question?
The outcome of my friend’s marriage speaks for itself.
But first let me tell you what the Husband meant by “sticking to his lifestyle.”
He reads newspaper everyday, rain or shine, at home or overseas. Initially he only reads one copy but now he has improved and reads 2-3 versions of newspapers in a day.
He only takes care of his own stuff. Family matters are not on his radar.
His to-do list is at the highest priority. Anything that of his Wife’s or Daughter’s that goes against his schedule is to be ignored cold-heartedly with no compromise.
House chore is like the plaque. He avoids it…hmmm…like the plaque.
He rather lets a third party to take care of the Daughter than getting his hand dirty babysitting her.
He can watch 3-4 movies in a row without blinking an eye – even though the clothes are piled up and unfolded or the rubbish is as high as Mount Everest.
In short, he lives in his own world (having a family is just a convenience for him) and no different from his always enchanting bachelor days.
The wife gave in and bent around the Husband. But the Husband became more and more daring and she felt like she is a slave to the marriage.
The Wife was very patient with him and she hoped that one day the Husband would wake up and be a changed man.
Hope remains hope.
10 years passed.
He is still what he is.
And enough is enough.
Finally, my friend took the courage and proposed a separation.
Here you go. That’s what you get when you “stick to your lifestyle.”
By right, marriage is supposed to be a union. A union that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. That is 1+1 is more than 2.
When you are hit by stick-to-your-lifestyle syndrome, this doesn’t work. But you’ve got a formula for a doomed marriage.
That’s for sure.